Unidentified Object!

John Fredsisi was looking at the sky on Thursday when he saw a spaceship heading towards him, than it vanished. John was so surprised he called his wife, Betty and she said, “Mate, I saw that thing to!” TNN got to interview John the morning after.

What did the thing look like?

It was a circular object with what looked like fuel coming out of the sides. It looked like a circular version of Endeavour.

When did you see it?

It was probably 9:30, I just went out for a bit because the weather was so nice. I looked up at the stars and saw something moving across the sky. I pulled out my phone, to record it, but dropped it in the grass. Just than, it sped over our house and the rockets started going.

How did your wife see it?

I called her right after I saw the spaceship thing, she was still at work. She said that she was cleaning the windows and saw the same thing I saw.

Did any others see it?

In the morning, I went to my neighbors house, they have security cameras in the back. I asked to see the whole footage, and when I got to 9:29 the camera flashed black, It came back up at 9:32 and the ting was gone.

Washington, Oregon, and West California become one, The UT of WOW!

As you know, West California was thinking about leaving Britain and now they have. There is a new country formed of 3 previous U.S. states is called The United Trio of WOW, which stands for Washington, Oregon and the West in West California. The new country has a great flag as you can see by the picture above. The national animal of the country is the Squirrel.  The national dish is Pesto Basil Soup since there is so much in the Earth. Hopefully the country will be successful, I heard they might try and get California to join.

The Super Bowl!

A new bowl has been completed in Atlanta, Georgia, the bowl can hold 103,449,942 pieces of cheerios. I know this is to awesome to comprehend, but look at the bowl above. It’s so big people are standing in it and playing games to pass the time. This new Super Bowl is so amazing that they are going to play a very important football game in it. Now when it floods you can swim in a bowl. The bowl is so big you have to have 12,940 people to reach one end to another. Wow, what a technological advancement from small bowls to SUPER BOWLS!

Look at  all the things it can be used for.

  1. Cheerios
  2. Cheerios Strawberry Flavor
  3. Cheerios Halloween Special
  4. Cheerios Apple Cinnamon
  5. And Much More

 

Zuzka Cerys Oberst sues Snapple Phone company for suing him!

As you know, Oberst was sued for copying the Snapple phones. This might mean he copied the design, but we are not sure. When he found out that he had to pay 205,000 pounds to Snapple Phone company, he was outraged. He literally ate a man because of the news (the man was actually a meme, he just took a fork and stabbed his computer, not realizing that it was his own Oberst Computer, which is in every way indestructible). Because of this “ridiculous nonsense” (we could sadly not translate this, but now that makes no sense), he sued them 2,000 euros. Sadly, Snapple Phone was so rich they could pay and now Zuzka is back in jail. That’s great news for Zuzka Cerys Oberst, JK!

Snapple Phone sues aPhone!

The Snapple company announced on Tuesday is is suing Zuzka Cerys Oberst because he copied Snapple phone’s design. He obviously copied Snapple and if you don’t say that your so unintelligent. Zuzka is not that smart he is actually very dumb. Also TNN makes fake news that didn’t actually happen. Now aPhone has gone out of business, they were sued 205,000 pounds. Now Zuzka is going to jail for 4 years, in Federal Prison.

Zuzka Cerys Oberst created the first aPhone!

No one knows who this guy is, but someone came upon him once and asked what he was holding. He said, “Dies ist ein aPhone. Ich habe es erfunden.” No one in the world knows what this mean, we can only detect it’s probably not German. No one even knows why the name of it starts with an “a”, nor why the name is English. But we do know that this guy is 2 and a half years old.

West California leaving Britain?

As you know, West California split away from the U.S. and joined Britain. They are doing really well now but have preposed to start a country with Washington and Oregon. Governor German Spagehtti said at a meeting on Thursday, “We are trying to get Oregon and Washington to join with us!” British parliament has no problem with West California leaving their country, so the might actually do it. In a meeting on Friday, Washington and Oregon’s government said, “Yes, we might let West California into our country, but only if Governor German Spaghetti resigns.”

Britain gives West California money and they leave U.S!

As you know, West California is or was a state in the U.S. West California didn’t really like the U.S. Britain decided they could join them and gave West California $16 billion to spend on growing their population. Washington & Oregon now named Oreginton have decided to ally with West California & Britain. The U.S. is really mad at this and have decided to start throwing potatoes at West California.

The Earth is Now Flat!

New studies show the Earth is flat with frozen waterfalls coming off the edge. That is right old peeps you were right about the earth being flat. Yale students made a study about the Earth being flat and 452% of people in the survey thought the Earth was flat, they were right. Galileo you were wrong, very wrong so wrong that could wrong right. Ahh, yes spelling wrong right hard to do but when you master it it’s amazing!