Category: World

The secret behind pancakes

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What are pancake really. According to BOB they are cardboard. They are secretly made with paper and trees. That is bad news to the ones with THE PAPER ALLERGY! This is bad. But pancakes do taste great, so this is horrible to all. Here at the pancake hut, Clock says, “We need to find the person who make recipe. we will replace recipe and give good one. Bye, bye old pancake recipe. Ha, ha, ha!” That was strange but maybe true? The recipe needs changing fo it to be good. Hopefully this will be resolved.

Update on Cookies

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The COOKIES are GONE. The Broccoli has reigned supreme with their brussel sprout minions. The have the cookie castle, the milk river and the COOKIE people. Dun, dun, dun! Why must this happen. The horror, the horror! The have the people imprisoned and all the chocolate stolen from cookie ville. More news will come in the future. For now live with Broccoli and veggies.

Cookies?

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I like cookies. Cookies are good! Cookie, cookie, cookie. That is why i’m writing about them. They have chocolate and dough and sugar. Why must they be so good. I want them for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. There has been rumors that there has become a cookie shortage. We have 3 days till’ they are all gone. When they are all gone the apocalypse will start and broccoli will rein supreme. We will be ruled by BROCCOLI!!!! Dun, Dun, DUUUUN!!! Later news will come later about this event.

2020-09-07T10:45:00

  days

  hours  minutes  seconds

until

Cookies Run Out!!!

Is The Loch Ness Monster Real?

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A scientist found new life in water. He was at squirrel town lake when he saw something in the water. Like any normal person, he swan to it. When he got to the place he saw it, it was nowhere to be found. Then, out of nowhere he was jerked under the water and he got a glimpse of a drowned monster. When we interviewed him he said it has a scuba mask on, with seaweed, and was glowing green. Could this be the first proof that the loch ness monster exists or was it just a diver that was in a nuclear power plant?

Rating: 5 out of 5.

Halloween seen as too scary for children – REPLACED WITH Happyween!

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There was a big protest from a lot of “quality” parents saying that Halloween had a bad influence on their children saying that it was too scary for them, so in response the “Government” changed Halloween to Happyween! In Happyween, children dress-up as nice characters like Mickey Mouse and they walk to different houses in the morning and the adults give them some nice vegetables to eat as they are healthier. Some people are mad about this change, but how could you argue with the same parents who don’t vaccinate their kids because they don’t want them to be autistic, so they would pretty much have their kid dead than have an autistic one… How could you possibly argue with that? Seems pretty terrible “reasonable” to me!

BREAKING NEWS: Thanks to group effort, Joe Buckaroo escapes!

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Joe Buckaroo is know for blowing up Turkey (nobody died btw) and also releasing good information to the people about the United States government. He was captured in California, and was transported to some high-tech facility, but thanks to a stolen US ARMY plane, a fake news company (totally not TNN), and a-lot of smoke he has escaped.

A fake news company and some of Joe’s friends stole a US ARMY plane and landed it in the prison, after releasing tons of smoke bombs, they came down on ropes and got Joe out of the prison. #GoJoe

Olives are now illegal in France! – BREAKING NEWS!

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BREAKING NEWS HERE AT TNN NEWS HEARDQUARTERS! In France, the very famous vegetable/fruit/idk is now illegal in that area. This has been met with very controversial statements from the people of France. People are saying that it is taking away their rights as people, which is probably a stretch but it was still a jerk move on France’s part. That’s literally it, great content on this site.

TNN is Raiding Area 51 on September 20th! – Announcement!

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Us at TNN are care very much about the world, so our site will be closed on the 20th, but there is another reason for this as well. Us as TNN News will be storming Area 51 in the Area 51 Raid. Ownernick will be a Kyle, Samesqurriely will be a tactical sniper, and the rest of us will be Naruto Runners to quickly dodge bullets and get into the base to try and quickly get into the Area 51 base. We will see all the aliens, the long lost dads, the real-life shreks, and we will find that all 4-wheel working cart! We will post what we experiences during the raid on September 21st, 2019 as the site will be down on the 20th.

-Ownernick

Inspirational Quotes

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“It’s not suicidal if it’s fun!” – Ownernick (A week ago or something)

“It’s not cheating if you win!” – Ownernick (Today)

“You are my fire, my one desire!” – Totallynotfrench (14 years ago)

“Thomas Edison is a good guy, like you!” – Thomas Edison (A long time ago)

“You are my one true Valentine!” – Some poem from 1st grade

“It’s not racist if they aren’t offended!” – Obama (12 days ago)

“You are like an apple, doctor’s hate you.” – Some guy (Yesterday)

“You are like a rotten apple, everyone hates you!” – Some guy (Tomorrow)

“You are like a mosquito, so gosh darn annoying!” – Some guy (Today)

PETA buys Facebook and regains the rights to Google!

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As we all know PETA has recently sold Google to Facebook for even more money because they “need” more money or something, but PETA’s true plant was to buy Facebook and regain Google at the same exact time. As PETA now owns Facebook they also own everything that Facebook owned as well, expanding PETA by even more companies. The only company bigger than PETA is Disney, but even Disney is starting to sweat at how fast PETA is growing, people expect PETA to overtake Disney by at least mid-2020. So whenever any of you hip kids go onto Snapchat or whatever, you should know that there will now be a lot more animals as it is now owned by PETA.

Joe Buckaroo (Guy who blew up Turkey) SPOTTED! – In Florida eating from a trash can…

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This is BREAKING NEWS! Joe Buckaroo, the evil man who blew up all of Turkey, was recently spotted eating from a Trash can in Turkey. Thanks to John Buthuwt for giving us this amazing info. It is unclear if this was actually Joe, because John didn’t give us any photographic evidence that it was in fact Joe, or if he even saw Joe in the first place, but I digress. It also just could’ve been some random hobo, I mean it was Florida so you never know. But, We saw later that John sent us another message stating that he saw Joe talking to this guy who looked a lot like Putin and he had a name tag that said “Putin Puten”. We don’t know what this means quite yet, but if the name Putin Puten sounds even a tiny bit familiar please contact us so we can catch this guy!