The Bestest Fake News on the Internet!
Donald Trump on February 1st, 2018 confirmed that he is a sandwich! Him confirming themselves as a sandwich SANDWICH IS NOW AN OFFICIAL GENDER IN THE USA!!! But, Qw would still call them a he or she based off there appearance. So, Next time you see Donald Trump you better not call him a “him”!
The bossiton post told us that cali said that they were not using any water to irrigate their plants but instead Gatorade? We cannot confirm these sources but you know if its true! Gatorade uses water and other stuff to make therefore they are still wasting water. Plants can’t get watered by gatorade it kills plants. Donald Trump or Donald Dump depending on what you call him came up this idea “this genius” did it again.
Tenold Trump the governor of West California had an air eating contest with Donald Trump. This happened at a conference to win back West California. This attempt failed because Tenold Trump won the air eating contest this was very crazy. Tenold Trump had 75 gulps of air while Donald had only 67 and fell asleep.
As you know, West California is or was a state in the U.S. West California didn’t really like the U.S. Britain decided they could join them and gave West California $16 billion to spend on growing their population. Washington & Oregon now named Oreginton have decided to ally with West California & Britain. The U.S. is really mad at this and have decided to start throwing potatoes at West California.
The new governor of Florida, French Spaghetti was attending a festival in downtown Tallahassee on Wednesday morning. Unfortunately during this festival one Florida citizen deflated French Spaghetti, he was rushed to the nearest air pumper. Florida officials have yet to find the suspects but one suspect has been detained, Willy Van Quathem. In a statement on Wednesday, Florida officials said French Spaghetti will be okay. Most people do not think Willy Van Quathem would do this because he loves balloons so much. Florida might be starting to regret the decision of making French Spaghetti governor because lots of people hate him. Of course, the reason for all this is that Florida’s humidity has been higher than average. Apparently Florida citizens have made a little something for French Spaghetti it goes like this. “Oh It’s French Spaghetti, yes, yes, yes! Let us praise our lord, French Spaghetti once and for all! Let us march to the capital for change, French Spaghetti! They say balloons don’t make good governors but there is always an exception.” Well, that’s Florida for you.
Well as you know everything happens in Florida, well the crazy stuff, it’s the humidity. Former Florida Governor Rick Scott resigned from the position with growing concerns about his safety. Because as you know everyone crazy is from Florida. Anyways a Balloon shown above is now Florida’s governor and to be fair he might be more sane then some residents. His name is French Spaghetti and he is 20 years old according to Florida, and you should not trust that source. Apparently they have no idea were he came from, I guess he just drifted into Florida. I feel very sorry for this balloon, and you should too. According to Florida (never trust this source) he has helped them out a lot even though he has only served for 2 days, it is because French Spaghetti is not affected by the humidity.
Now there are 51 states! Founded in 65,000,000 B.C., this state lasted one year and then was muted, as in it sunk underwater. The state shifted, however, to end up on the coast of Maine. Alabraska is also known as Atlantis, but as Alabraska is definitely a foreign word, it made more sense to use it now since it sounds like Alabama and Nebraska combined. The state has beautiful waterfalls and amazing views, to bad it is in the U.S. Jk, the U.S. is great, well bye!
The United States now only has 49 states since West California joined earlier this week. Oregon & Washington announced, “We wish you would leave us alone U.S!” The U.S. has been yelling at Washington for awhile now and Washington is tired of it. Oregon is of course Washington’s sister so they are leaving to because family stay together. Goodbye we will miss you, oh and the Seattle Seahawks will still play.
The US wants to destroy the new state West California for buying too much produce. They bought 14,000,000 million pounds of apples plus, 75,000,000 million pounds of tomatoes. This blown out all of Normal California´s apples and tomatoes. This was very scary because that is 95% of the US apples and tomatoes. According to Donald Trump, ¨ I want Nuke West California…” We are currently trying to stop please donate to the save the West California ( totally not to pay the website) please donate.
Amazingly new land has been brought into the United States, it’s called West California and is right off the coast of Florida. The population of this new state is around 29,958 people, 5,523 dogs and 4,737 cats. The image above is one of the beaches called, “Get Out Beach”. Other beaches include Fat Man Swimming Reserve, Blurry Pig Cove, and Ahh Shark Beach. The new state expresses concerns about being so close to Florida, they think their crazy or something.
YES!! Donald J. Trump is a cannibal! He eats human meat!?!?! He says how it tastes “Man… it tastes really good! It reminds me of a triple Big mac with a side of canned turkey eyes and deviled hams!” As you can see by this Donald Trump is a complete idiot with a lack of brains in his head. He is really stupid, I think we can all agree on that. But, he does 100% eat human meat on a regular basis! He later died of how unhealthy human meat is and then he died of aids on September 56, 1856… Sad, but as of course he is real dumb and he deserved every bit of it.
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